Category: Planning & Etiquette
Despite the old adage, the last thing you want on your wedding day is to end up feeling blue. Consider these timeless tips for wedding party etiquette to keep everyone in check.
OK, we’ve all heard the horror stories, but no matter how much of a diva the bride-to-be is being, you agreed to this role, so here’s how to deal.
- Divide and conquer. Make a list of all bridesmaid duties, create a timeline and assign bridesmaids to each task. That way, you’ll all have a clear sense of expectations before and during the big day. With everything covered, the bride won’t even have the chance to turn into a bridezilla.
- Agree to be a bridesmaid without knowing what you’re getting yourself into. Triple-check your calendar to make sure you’re available for not only the wedding itself, but also the bachelorette party, wedding dress fitting and any other festivities where the bride-to-be expects your presence. While it might be awkward, don’t be afraid to ask about expenses involved with being a bridesmaid. A custom dress, hair and makeup, shoes, accessories, plane tickets, hotel rooms and the costs associated with the bachelorette party and wedding shower can add up quickly.
Despite the “epic” stories you’ve heard from your buddies, attending a wedding is not about you having a good time, bro. Don’t turn into a groomsman-gone-wild, just be the man the groom asked you to be.
- Ask if there’s anything you can do to help. With last-minute preparations, there’s often some heavy lifting that needs to be done. Luckily for the groomsmen, you don’t have to spend hours in hair and makeup. Step up and offer to take care of something, ensuring the wedding goes well for your buddy and his bride-to-be.
- Relive your college days. While it’s totally awesome to see all your old cronies again, this isn’t spring break in Cabo. Your friend is participating in a rite of passage, and it is an honor that he asked you to be a part of it. That doesn’t mean you can’t still have fun—just don’t lose control.
While Monster-In-Law was just a movie, there are plenty of real life horror stories that bring up cause for concern. Make sure you don’t wind up turning into someone’s worst nightmare.
- Compliment the bride. Obviously, she’s already receiving loads of well wishes from friends and family, but hearing it from an in-law makes a difference. Seriously.
- Air your grievances. While the officiant may say, “Speak now or forever hold your peace,” now’s really not the time to raise your concerns. In fact, if you haven’t had these conversations by now, you might as well just accept that this whole thing is happening and move on.
You may not have stayed up all night making a dream board, but this is your big day too. So do what you can to make it one for the books.
- Make conversation. Walk around, smile, shake hands and talk to your sweetheart’s extended family and old friends. The bride can easily get caught up with last-minute wedding touches, so it’s nice to know someone is mingling with guests.
- Criticize. If you weren’t an active participant in the planning process, that ship has sailed. It’s too late to find fault now. Even if you were a big part of the planning, it’s better to roll with the punches when something goes wrong. After all, there’s no use in crying over spilled champagne.
The last way you want to be remembered on your wedding day is as a scary bridezilla. Be calm and carry on…down that aisle.
- Be grateful. Yes, it is your day, but a lot of people came together to make this day special. Meaningful wedding favors are a simple way to express your thanks, but you can also personally thank guests as they leave for an added touch, saying things like, “Leaving so soon? It meant the world having you here. Thanks so much for celebrating with us.” And don’t forget about your wedding party! Your bridesmaids probably dedicated a lot of time and money to help you get down that aisle. Show them how much you appreciate their love with a unique bridesmaid gift.
- Sweat the small stuff. OK, so this one is hard. We know that you’ve spent months and months planning this day right down to scheduled bathroom breaks. Yet, you’re just going to have to accept that not everything is going to go according to plan. And it’s going to be OK. Really.
SEE ALSO: If you’re looking for more sage wedding advice, check out our 45 dos and don’ts for brides, by brides.
Have a sweet story or horror story to share about your wedding party? Whether it’s for better or for worse, we’d love to hear about it—so go ahead and send it our way at firstname.lastname@example.org.